Loves it

Yes.  Steeler Nation is grating the Green Bay Packers cheese.

YES!

Two Wolves

Got this from my mother.  I loved it so much I had to share.

TWO WOLVES

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside all people.  He said, ‘My son, the battle is between two ‘wolves’ inside us all.

One is Evil.  It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good.  It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.’

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather:  ‘Which wolf wins?’

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Alone in the world

Yesterday, I had the great joy of going out to lunch with a former colleague (she started at school the same year I did, and worked there for 3 years...we actually spent many a days of TFA training curled in a ball, crying on a carpet) and a few of our other colleagues.  We got to sit and just...chat.  There was no pressure about "not talking about school" because we were out and stressed.  No.  We talked about school specifically, education in the broad sense...just everything.

Well, one of my current (fabulous) colleagues gets to talk to most of our former students who have gone off to high school because they love to come back and visit her.  And she got to teach them how to dissect things and I'm sure blow up stuff, so they love her.  I remember loving my 8th grade science teacher the same way...she was young, made us do science that was so ridiculously hard that we were prepared to answer every question in high school, and got us to experiment and understand the most interestingly complex things.  This science teacher does this for our kids, too. 

So we started talking about how many of our former loves have dropped out of school and are on drugs and/or pregnant.  It scares me.  We leave them to go do great things, and then, in high school, with few adults that care, parents that work long hours and think that "teenagers" don't need supervision, and bad influences running rampant around the neighborhood, they become hot messes. 

What can we do? 


How can fiesty K, a girl from my first year who yelled at me so much that we had to have an intervention with her mom, her other teacher, myself, and Language Line, and it came out that K was so mad at her mom for NOT LETTING HER SHAVE HER LEGS that she was taking it out on me, BE PREGNANT?  


HOW?  She had so much potential.  Now she's 14 and pregnant. 

Early childhood education is important, yes, but so is life decision education.  Don't you think that if my babies got educated on being smart, reproductive choices and consequences, and the REAL dangers of drugs and alcohol, that they would make better choices LATER in life? 

We're leaving them alone in this world. 

Celebration. For one.

So, I've been running. 

I downloaded an app onto my ipod touch the day after new years because, well, it was part of my "be more adventurous in 2011."  I thought, self, obviously you don't want to look awful at your sister's wedding in April because these may be the only family wedding pictures your family gets, so, let's not look gross.  You should do something about that.  I chose running.  Running, well that's an adventure. 

It's almost been a whole month.  (After I complete tomorrow's workout, I will be DONE with week 4.)

There are many things I love about running, now.  First, it happens to be about 30 minutes I can clear my head.  No thinking about school.  No thinking about stress.  No thinking about anything but the awesome music I'm rocking out too.  Second, I get to track my workouts and I actually see myself improve.  Yesterday, I ran a 13 minute mile.  For 2 and a half miles.  (What?  Yes.  I totally did that.)

But mostly, I love running on the treadmill at my gym because I overlook the entire weight room.  Full of very, very cute boys lifting weights.  It's like 30 minutes of eye candy.  It makes me smile. 

Info overload

One of my favorite family members (don't you love when everyone grows up, gets married, and actually bring in new people to the family who aren't crazy?) sent me some food for thought today.

First, this. School of One. I swooned. Literally, fell in love with this. Mainly because people are figuring out that a teacher cannot meet the needs of every learner if we only teach one way. (You mean, even though I'm fucking engaging as watching your first naughty clip on you-tube, not everyone will learn everything?) So these kids are given CHOICE. Whoah there. You mean, kids choose how they want to learn? Shut. Up. I did a version of this in middle school and I turned out okay. (And so did most of my peers who did the same program. We all function. And mostly have graduated from college and have semi-decent jobs.)

And then, this study. It scares the crap out of me that the parents who matter the most are the parents of poor children. And the wealthier you get, the more influential your genetic makeup becomes. So wait, that's why there are all those rich kids doing lines of coke at parties and shooting up black tar heroin? (Then what is the excuse of all of the kiddos from where I teach doing that? Well. not lines. a crackpipe. But still...you get the idea...) This research just makes me want to advocate parenting classes on every street corner. Or put birth control hormones in the water.

Dying.

I love this.

The Oatmeal always makes me smile.

Things that also make me smile?

I told the kids that they didn't have to write "all of the things." And then I chuckled to myself. ALL of the THINGS!

And no one laughed when I kept repeating, "all of the things" to myself. No one at lunch. No one.

Love.

I just love this show so much, I have to celebrate any time it is put in the news. Especially the NY Times.

All I ask is for some participation...

You know what I don't like?

People who don't participate.

Guys, we're working super hard to make work a more delightful place to be. We're trying to close the achievement gap. We're trying to push these kids to do well on a test that only matters to us and our names. They do, in fact, use these test scores to berate teachers, remember?

So, just suck it up and try to pump up the kids.

The 90's club is cool...it's where we want our kids to strive to for the benchmarks.

So all I'm asking, teachers, is to dress up. Seriously. Dress in 90's clothes. That's all we ask. My committee plans a lot of events (at least one a month) and ALL we ask is that you stop being a party pooper and participate.



Seriously, just pump up the volume. Be coo' like that.

Aw crap.

It was gearing up to be a stressful day.

The kids were testing my patience and during math class, one of my lovelies was following me around. With his paper. Everywhere. Instead of doing what I asked.

We all must realize that this child needs so much POSITIVE attention and will shut down with a minuscule piece of negative attention.

So I got fed up with him, and in a moment of weakness, instead of helping him, I looked at him and said sharply, "I asked you to sit down and try this yourself. You won't even try. I'm getting really annoyed with this right now and will not help you." I said this in my sharp voice. My middle school teacher voice.

He ran away from me, crumpled his paper, and burst into tears.

F*$king tears? Really?

Shit, I thought to myself. I screwed this up. He refused to talk to me for a good 30 minutes. Then, when he realized that I, in fact, was the same person he has loved and adored and wouldn't give up on him (which I think he thinks I did), he came around. And answered questions. And stopped crying.

Stern voices don't work with my babies. I forgot about this. And forgot about how much patience you need with this bunch.

A letter to algebra...

Seriously fantastic...

I think she could be Brown's best friend. Seriously. This is amazing.

I ♥ my friends

After happy hour yesterday, we sat around and watched ridiculous you-tube videos so we could laugh.

This video was shown because "Ms. L, I know you'll love it."

My friends know me too well.

Cultural (un)Awareness

I just have to relive journal time today.

I asked them to write about Martin Luther King Jr., and speculate why we have a holiday for him.

The response?

"Martin Luther King Jr., and his mother, Rosa Parks, sat on a bus."

"Wait, honey, no, Rosa Parks was not MLK's mother."

"She wasn't?"

How could I react?

Growth. Yes. Growth.

So I decided to give my kids the "midyear" BRI test. This will measure their reading growth. "Normal" kids should grow a year in a year. And by normal, I mean, kids who are upper middle class and go to schools that aren't failing.

For us to close the achievement gap, kids need to make significant gains, ie, 2 years growth in one year.

I tested one of my lowbies today. He came into 5th grade reading at a second grade level independently. We had a ton of work to do to, well, you know, teach him how to read.

It's January. He's currently reading at a fifth grade level independently.

If you cannot add, that's 3 years growth in half a year.

It's days like these that I know why I'm closing the achievement gap.

No wonder people jump off bridges...

I want to take everyone back to my eleventh grade math class.

I was advanced in school, and we took a class as juniors called "Pre-Calculus and Discrete Mathematics." PDM for short. It "got us ready" for calculus. (I should have known then, when I stared agape at the introduction of a tangent line, that I was going to bomb calc. But I digress.)

In this class, we learned a lot of discrete math. As JUNIORS IN HIGH SCHOOL. Juniors who were advanced, in a pretty affluent, successful midwestern city. These kids were going places. Like college.

The first time I was introduced to this problem (The Konigsberg Bridge problem) was in my discrete math book in high school. Junior year.

Now let's transport ourselves to the present. Guess what problem I am getting my kids to solve next week? The Konigsberg Bridge problem.

These little lovelies cannot even add fractions yet I have to spend my time, according to the Arizona department of education, teaching my children about EULER PATHS and CIRCUITS and SOLVING THIS DAMN BRIDGE PROBLEM.

I'm pretty sure there was a reason I didn't learn discrete math until high school. I was learning how to think algebraically. I was learning how to think. I wasn't bogged down in content.

I don't like it

I don't like this.

For various reasons.

Mostly the fact that the principal though he could hire 1 master teacher, and put 3 other novices in the room with 60 children, and it would be okay. It would not make the master teacher crazy. It would not overwhelm the other teachers.

HELLO?

Obviously, doing something like this is a bad idea - thinking that new teachers will be able to figure out how to collaborate with 3 other colleagues. And teach when 40 children are running amuk.

Its the maths

This week we're supposed to learn about counting problems and the multiplication principle of counting.

What does that mean?

Here's a sample: Johnny has to pick out an outfit for his upcoming date. He can choose to wear a red shirt, a blue shirt, or a plaid shirt. He can wear jeans, shorts, or dress pants. For an accessory, he can wear a crown, a cowboy hat, or a baseball cap. If he wears a shirt, bottoms, and a hat, how many different outfits does he have to choose from?

Well, you could draw a tree diagram. Which is what we learned today. Or you could use the multiplication principle of counting (3 x 3 x 3) and eventually end up with 27.

Either way, we're taking a week to discover how to solve these, find the patterns, explain the multiplication principle of counting, and constructing our own scenarios.

So, I'm a great teacher or my kids are geniuses, because the back half of my room solved the problems and discovered the MPC in 30 minutes. WTF? All my experience with teaching this math crap to the kids (many years people, many times have I taught this) is that it takes a while to get it. A while to connect the tree to numbers. (Unless you are gifted. But these kids are not.)

30 minutes. To figure it out for themselves.

So what did I do? Put them in "discovery groups" in the back, and throw them the 7th grade counting problems I used to use. They had to solve the problems in 2 ways and show their work. I worked with the rest of the class on drawing countless tree diagrams.

This is how I know I made it.

A kid raises his hand, and I walk to his "discovery group." He asks, "Can we show you how to solve the problem in MORE than 2 ways? Like 3? Or 4?" (be still my heart. I love you, kiddo. Love love love that you want to over-solve a problem)

My reply: "Why yes you can. Show me as MANY as you want." (Because you have another 50 minutes to work since our friends in the front cannot even remember how to add.)

Operation GTFOOH

We have commenced Operation Get The F&#k Out Of Here.

How does Operation GTFOOH work?

I do everything in my power to get a new job for next year.

I'm applying for jobs and jobs and jobs and grad school applications are flying around in admissions committees. (My alma mater, well know for it's admissions pyre, has my application sitting in committee right now)

I wonder where Operation GTFOOH is going to take me? Let's hope somewhere where I can
a) Close the achievement gap
b) Love my job
c) Own riding boots

Missing my support system...

Today was a day where I missed my support system at my job. You see, we have academic coaches who work with teachers and help them.

Well, my math academic coach for my first 3 years of teaching left this year to take an awesome job somewhere else. Which I admire. And my reading academic coach for the last 2 years left this year to take an awesome job somewhere else. (Anyone seeing a trend? Could the trend be - get the hell OUT of my school? Perhaps?)

So today, when I was at a curriculum committee at the district office, my new academic coach was there too.

For the last few years of this committee work, my old coach would sit next to me and we would write snarky notes to each other.

But today - there were no notes. There was no snarky. There were no arguments or inside jokes or general ridiculousness.

And I am SO sad that my support system is gone. :( They were always there for me.

The Man

So, when we have to go to computers as a special, we have to walk into the second-story building and walk up the stairs to the computer lab.

5th graders walking up stairs "sounding like mice, not elephants," is always a difficult task. I always convince them that the cameras in the hallways are pointed directly to them, and someone is always monitoring their behavior, even if I cannot see them.

There is a place the staircase curves, and it gives me a blind spot for the front of the line. As they are walking up the stairs, I yell out, "Don't FORGET! The MAN is watching!"

One of my students goes, "Hello, Man!" and waves to the camera.

SO. FREAKING. HILARIOUS.

Too hilarious to not share.

I don't know why, but I find this video to be hysterical. Please, laugh.

It all comes down to this, doesn't it...

This is the latest technological fad in education, as per the NY Times.

This is my favorite part of the article:
“There is very little evidence that kids learn more, faster or better by using these machines,” said Larry Cuban, a professor emeritus of education at Stanford University, who believes that the money would be better spent to recruit, train and retain teachers. “IPads are marvelous tools to engage kids, but then the novelty wears off and you get into hard-core issues of teaching and learning.”

Amen, my friend, amen. It all comes down to the hard-core teaching and learning, doesn't it? DOESN'T IT?

I'm pretty sure DaVinci didn't have an Ipad. He did pretty well for himself.

Karma. Or coming full circle.

I was looking at my bookshelf today after school, looking for a specific book.

I caught sight of this: a book my mother bought for me when I graduated college and moved into my new role in the working world.

I've read it once, and I think I should probably read it again. Why? Because today I read this article in the NY Times, about the new chancellor's first day of school.

What does the new chancellor say about good schools?

"Taking stock of all she has seen so far, Ms. Black said, 'Where there’s a strong and effective principal, where parents are committed, you have great schools.'”

Oh YEAH. The author of my inspirational big girl book is the new NYC school chancellor. Karma? Coming full circle?

Or just getting so frustrated with my lack of leadership that I MUST get away, put my big girl pants on, and find something to do where I am valued.

Time to do some reading. And job applications.

Back to work...

My means of procrastination were very useful today...

I baked muffins and made the most amazing vegetarian pasta (complete with made from scratch sauce) because I was "bored."

And by bored I mean refused to think about going back to work tomorrow.

I really, really wish I had a few more days of vacation.

A girl can dream, right?

Out of character

Since it is 2011, I decided to think about what I wanted to do this year that was different. How was I going to make 2011 special?

I got to thinking that the most exciting times in my life have been when I've gone on adventures. Become adventurous. Do something out of character. Choosing a college out of my home state was an adventure. Moving across the country to teach? Adventurous and out of character.

So what did I do today?

Got a tattoo.

I've wanted one for years. YEARS. Since I was 18. So I finally did it. I got one on my left wrist (that's right. I've been obsessed with wrist tattoos for a long time.)

Why? Because in 2011, I want to be adventurous. And this was my first adventure. :)